Email started it, I suppose.  With it’s instantness and it’s efficiency.  In the beginning, as per human nature, it took the form of correspondence that we as a society were familiar with.  Letter writing.  It was like sending a letter, it only got there two days earlier than before.

Dear Mr. York,

It has been far too long since we have seen each other.  We should really be better about getting together on a regular basis.  Let’s stay in touch and perhaps meet up for a meet later this month.

Have your secretary get in touch with mine.  They’ll set a time and place.

Sincerely,

Mr. Smith

Formal letter writing quickly became the thing of the past when it was so much easier to type a memo without a stuffy greeting and much faster without worrying about proper capitalization or punctuation.

paul

let’s grab a drink. you free friday

j

Anything semblance of the afore mentioned proper capitalization and punctuation went out the window with the rise of instant messaging.  It was a necessity at this point.  In order to keep the flow and timing of a semi-normal conversation, typing/spelling/words had to be has quick and easy as possible.  Hence the birth of LOL. ²

pauleewifpashun4pottery hey. sup?

jdawg just watchin you’ve got mail. you?

pauleewifpashun4pottery i love that movie

pauleewifpashun4pottery wanna grab a drink later this week?

jdawg me too.

jdawg yeah, that’d be great.

And before I continue my diatribe, I must take time to make this little side note.  In elementary school, like many others of that day, I had to take a typing class from day one.  ³ It’s where I learned my home row keys and also where I learned that I really liked to press buttons.  However, it wasn’t until AOL/AIM came along that I my typing skills really started to sore.  Also, my ability to carry on two strands of thought in one conversation window without losing track.  Speaking of, I should get back to my topic.

Apparently the loss capitalization and punctuation was only the tip of a deep and expansive iceberg of illiteracy.  One day, some dude (I presume dude, but I also presume Japanese, but that’s because I’m inherently naive) came up with the idea of the text message, aka the short message or the SMS.  This was an amazing thing because when a thought didn’t warrant a full conversation, one could just send it in a text.  Though sadly, there was one small problem.  There are twenty six letters in the English language, plus silly little things like punctuation and spaces between words.  There are ten numeric keys on the standard phone.  Before some second dude invented predictive text, typing out a full sentence, God forbid two, became quite the hassle. Further shorthand was required.

u want to meet 4 drinks?

Of course, for some reason known only to the former planet Pluto, this started a whole new spelling trend where things were spelled incorrectly even when they didn’t make the word any shorter or efficient. IE, the Z in place of the S trend.  Text messages, combined with emailing and instant messaging, birthed a whole new English in the developing youth.  A horrible, shameful one.  Not to mention one that I find more difficult to understand than just typing out the words.  Large chunks of text all over the internet started to look like this.

i have inzane dreamz. dreamz wher i crawl in2 a big pot of cawfee and swim around 4 dayz.

also i tink mark is sooooooooooooo kewl

And then one day, everyone had a blog, not just limited to those people who had something to say.  Thoughts of what people did in their day to day life and who they were warring with at school flooded the internet.

Which brings us to Twitter.  Twitter, who’s only purpose that I can see, is to become friends with celebrities.  For those outside the loop, Twitter is the site where users can log on to update their thoughts or whatever, but are limited to doing so in 140 characters.  Now, not only can we find out what you had for lunch or what poster you just bought, but we can do it from our telephones or computers while checking what everyone else had for lunch or what poster THEY bought all in the same place quickly and painlessly.

paulee evrybdy shud cum 2 #Cheers 4 drinks! its @jdawg going away prty. 530 cnr park & main. c u ther!

And that is what sealed the deal.  That killed the English language and spelling and grammar forever.  I fear that there is no turning back now.  Tomorrow it will only be something else.  Some shorthand of shorthand that will make thinking minimal and our eyes melt.

I miss words.  I like how they sound and how they look and how they feel being typed out on the keyboard.  Admittedly, I’m  a child of the internet who is terrified of talking on the phone and prefers to communicate via email or text.  This perhaps is another downfall of the technology, the lack of intimacy and fear of close communication, but I know I can’t try to stop progress or really even blame it for our problems.  I just miss words.  And sentences.  And handwritten notes.  And reading things that are created to make you think instead of the opposite.

_________

So I sit down with my ever so slightly used gel pen and my ever so slightly used airport-purchase steno pad.  And proceed to stare at it’s mocking blue lines for two days.

Yes.  It has happened.  Again.  Writer’s Block.

But how, one might ask.  I have all these ideas whizzing through my head.  Worlds.  Characters.  Themes.  Gags.  Humor.  Emotions.  All of which I’m sure if I could get onto to paper, the world at large (or at least a decent sampling) would be amazed, or at least entertained.  But they all remain there like shoppers trying to get out of the bottle necked Walmart parking lot on Christmas Eve.

A quick Google search turns up hundred of articles similar to this one.  Particular theories on what causes and what could help cure the elusive Writer’s Block.  Mr. Taylor’s causes are as follows:

• Cause 1: Writers are sometimes not ready to write
• Cause 2: Writers are sometimes afraid to write
• Cause 3: Writers often try to compose in their heads
• Cause 4: Writers often start in the wrong place

These “causes” are fairly straight foward.  Don’t get ahead of yourself.  Don’t micro-manage.  Start broad, then narrow.  Take it one step at a time.  You have to walk before you can run.  Doodle before you can draw.  The usual.

Now, if you’ll refer back to my own list of the exciting locked up things in my brain, you’ll notice that the word “Story” does not appear anywhere.  I have worlds and themes and emotions and people all hanging around.  All the ingredients sitting in my pantry but no idea how to put them together to make a damn good soufflé.  Hell,  I don’t know if I could even manage a box of Jiffy at this point.

David Taylor’s silly little advice points are too vague, too 101, and probably too true.

Perhaps I am doing all the wrong things, but it’s how I’m going to get to write things.  And damn it, one day I will have something better and more exciting than a blog post full of useless comments about not writing.

Now to the favorite part of my day.  Lunch.

My father used to use those cheap plastic fountain pens but switched to the gel pen in the late 90’s.  He always encouraged us to write in cursive, but he usually wrote in some connected print hybrid himself.

Elizabeth Dunbar from the 7th grade used those Pilot Precise pens with the needle points and had the penmanship envied by all.

My friend Soli had every gel pen color imaginable. 

Stacy wrote with a Dr. Grip, but she thought babies were deposited into the girl by the boy, so really, she turned out to be an idiot.

Jessica, from down the street, favored the impractically dull but colorfully painted wooden pencil.

My first boyfrend only wrote in those plastic Bic pens he could buy 10 for a dollar.

My brother refused to write with anything at all.  This continues to be one of his greater downfalls.

What does this mean really?  Can I psycho analyze these people by their stationary choices? My mother makes mistakes so she needs to be able to erase?  My father is smooth with a slight girlish flair?  What does that even mean?  Nothing.  I admire a person who knows what pen they want to write with.  I don’t know why, but it’s possibly because I have no idea what mine is.  It’s an ongoing search that seems to be delayed by passing whims.  I write the neatest with ballpoint, but I love a good fountain pen.  A weighty pen feels awesome in my hand, but why pay $45 for a pen I will lose and/or move on from in days.

I would love to say that I desire to do great things, or at least strive for world peace.  But no.  I want very simple things in life.  The perfect pen that makes my handwriting look like a computer did it.   A day-planner laid out in the exact way I feel is most efficient.  A pad of paper that makes ink shine, that won’t soak up all my ink, and that wins Oscars.

The problem is, my standards are impossibly high and impossibly erratic.  I will never have a choice pen because I’ll never know what I want.  I’ll never have the perfect pen because it does not exist.  I maintain the belief that a good pen will solve all my problems, and unfortunately I am finding out this is not how the world works.  Just because I have the same pen that Jed Bartlett uses does not mean that one day I will be POTUS.

Having a day-planner will not guarantee appointments.  A pen will not give me flawless penmanship.  And a pad of paper won’t write itself.

And yet, here I am, still looking.

When writing a movie, I think writer’s are often out to create a script that “changes people’s lives forever.”  I guess this is either because they want an Oscar or they are just blinded by their own pretension.  It can go either way really. I agree with Mr. August that there are many profoundly inspiring movies, but I don’t think that’s necessarily because the writer started out with that goal in mind.

I think that it is very easy to forget about the story we want to tell.  We spend so much time toiling over the bureaucracy of structure, ¹ the turmoil of the craft and the creation of the subtle, yet well-honed message that we forget about making a good story.  I vote that here and now is the perfect oppurtunity to knock down the walls of pretension and just let ourselves be swept away by the utter enjoyment of being completely entertained by story.

I’m not saying that all movies have to become fluff or lack substance (or subtext).  SciFi movies are known for being  commentary on our actual society, but you don’t feel like there’s propaganda being hammered into your skull for two hours straight. It’s just that, without story there is no film.  Period.

Story is good.

_______

There are people out there who deserve books, people who do incredible things, hurdle through insurmountable odds, break down barriers… or at least attempt something mildy interesting.  People who spend six, seven, eight, twelve hours of their day in front of their word processors are not those people.  Not usually anyway.  I find that if someone is out doing something that’s worth writing a book over, being a writer is usually the farthest thing from their mind.

Fiction writers, including but not limited to, screenwriters and novelists, are usually fairly boring human beings.  I find that most of them are white, middle class, somewhere in the age of thirty and fifty who live fairly domesticated lives.  What would be so exciting in their lives worth sitting through an hour and a half of?  Or paying twenty bucks to read?

My biggest obstacle today was mowing the lawn.  It’s conflict was that I have Barbie’s Dream Mower and it chokes if it comes near grass.  I persisted on, and mowed that grass, fulfilling my ultimate goal.  My human flaw:  I didn’t edge and the grass around the edges are still bordering on knee height.  The ingredients were there, I had the challenge, the conflict, the antagonist, etcetera, but it would have made a lousy recipe.  A metaphorical rice cracker, if you will.

Now, I’m not saying these fairly-boring-lifed writers are not talented,  I’m just saying that maybe they should keep their life story (or a story “inspired by” their life) in their back pockets until they inadvertently cure cancer with Spell Check.

______

The age old debate continues.  Superman, or Batman?

I have read more than one article/blog now saying big movie execs are worried about the future of a squeaky clean Superman in the dark realm of heroes such as Batman and Hellboy.  In a way, I guess I can understand the panic.  In a world of self-professed cynics we relish the the flawed hero, or even the anti-hero, which I guess is fairly interchangeable at this point. For Pete’s sake, even the Harry Potter movies fight for that dark and broody, angst filled atmosphere… and they’re based on children’s books. (Go back and read the first four novels… Not broody or cynical.  Children’s books.)  You know what, that’s fine.  Largely those movies work and for various reasons, and are hugely popular, but just because a couple movies work one way, doesn’t mean they all have to.

Superman has always been a much lighter hero, right up to the bright blue spandex.  He is the squeaky clean, super human, bringer of hope.  To change that for box office purposes would completely change who that entire character is.  Where Batman sees the flaws and warts of humanity,  Superman sees the strength and good-will of it.  What’s wrong with that?  In today’s world, where bombs are being dropped on various countries by various enemies, children are shooting their peers, and politicians play bloody knuckle boxing with tax-payers, why can’t we go to a movie to see someone actually be able to save the world, just because he wants to?

Superman is an idealist.  He does not seek revenge or have too many inner-demons to battle, and though he may not represent the ever-popular downfalls of humanity, he does represent the hope that we have all seem to have forgotten these days.  He doesn’t need to be the same as Batman to succeed.  He’s Superman for Heaven’s sake.  Use what you have on the table in front of you, don’t go stealing off of other people’s tables.  With the USA being ripped apart by this year’s election over issues that there seems to be no Right or Wrong answers for, and when the people are doing nothing but screaming for a savior,  ¹ why not just give them one?  Superman does not play in the grey areas, he’s so Black and White, so good vs evil and he wins everytime.  Don’t underestimate people’s need for that.

Superman and Batman are different heroes, that’s why there’s two of them.  Let Superman stay Superman.  Batman gets to come into his own being Batman.  So, let Superman come into his own by being Superman.

That being that, onto Topic #2, and I wouldn’t mind someone swooping in and saving the day.

Today I will finish Draft Two of one of my screenplays  – that is, if I will get off the internet and finish it’s last sequence.  It’s a decent draft, much better than the first, but it is still facing a lot issues, a lot of which I created for it with the premise.  Six redheaded women are forced to stay under the same roof after the death of the patriarch.   Adding to the claustrophobia, two of the women are former wives of the man while the other four of the offspring of the respective unions.  The fact that the action takes place under one roof where little happens in terms of plot stimulus, the women are forced to continually rehash their past with one another.  Anyone who has taken Screenwriting 101, or even has just SEEN a movie, knows that the last thing that any audience wants to sit through is a bunch of people sitting around talking about the past… except, for some reason, in The Big Chill, that was a huge success. ²  I am completely stuck on how to bring about keeping the story in the present as well as bringing a bit more action³ to it.  So yeah, that’s where I am with that.

I feel as though until I can work out some of the big flaws, as well as a title⁴, it would be pointless to pursue another draft.  And to be honest, I don’t think I could do that right now.  It has worn me out, and I need a break.  So where do I go from here?   I have a few options,  I suppose:

1. I have another screenplay that I have draft 1 already out there for.  It needs a lot of plot work, as well, in order for another draft to be attempted.  It’s difficult but not impossible.  I like this project, it’s a bit lighter in tone and not quite as soapy  – though I never intended my Redheads project to fall under the “soapy” category, for the record.
2. I also have a TV Show that I am trying to develop.  If I had to choose, this would probably be my “passion project.”  It’s something that I have been swirling around with for a few years now.  I’ve written scraps that could eventually wind up as a bible and a draft of the pilot episode.  Both need considerable work before they have the ZAP and PUNCH that I think is completely achievable with the idea and that’s fine.  I can work with that.  It’s my favorite idea so far, but honestly, probably the one that’s least likely to get me any work at the moment.
3. This last week or so I have been itching to get started on this new idea that’s been brewing in my head.  It’s the idea that the more I think about the project I’m working on, the more I think about starting this idea. It is called Finding Geraldine and it is to be a feature film.  I have deliberately suppressed working on it because I would get swallowed by it and never finish Redheads. I’d love to start now, but I fear taking on yet another project would just cause me to neglect my existing ones and they would never get any further.
4. Hopefully next year, I will be applying for the ABC Disney Writer’s Fellowship. Hopefully.  It is an intensive (and very competitive) program where they throw you into the TV writing business and help you hone some skills with on the job training.  It is how many TV writers in L.A. get their start.  In the application you must submit a TV Spec episode (essentially a glorified Fan Fic ep) of a series in production.  This will probably take me months to do because of all the research  – which I promise involves slightly more than just watching the series over and over — and planning involved.  I have a little less than year to get this underway.

So there you have it.  How do I spend my days now?

And also I would much appreciate your advice on how I can get out of the house in the process.  I’m tired of being here all day alone with my body image.

One could say, “Well, if you were smart, you could use this time to finish the two screenplay drafts that you’re working on” to which I would say, “Narg.”  I don’t even feel inspired to write fictional stories rooted in no actual fact, and in theory, that’s a much easier task than finding mini-essay topics, right? 

A lot of good this post has down both of us.  I promised myself that this blog would never turn into a “Today I ate a Sandwich and sorta played checkers” blog, but I guess I’m a liar.

So, to console you and me alike, below I have posted network premiere dates.  Do enjoy.  They are mildly more interesting than what I have to say.  And if that doesn’t suit, go take the “Laura Roslin” Quiz.

A list of the Major Network premieres by Date (not network).  Networks include the four major ones; NBC, ABC, CBS, and FOX as well as the CW.

Also, FYI:

Dexter premieres September 28th.  And for those who care, The L Word airs January 4, 2009.

Also, there is no official word on the dates announced for Dollhouse and Battlestar Galactica.  Word says both will go to air in early 2009.

UPDATE: By Popular demand… or at least a query…

BMI: 22.61 which puts me just under 61 kg.

Weight to lose: 1.5 kg

Date to lose it by: Tomorrow.

SIgh.

I don’t know how Meredith Grey does it.  I’m completely surrounded by doctors and ailments that I can hardly concentrate on getting to the fun relationship stuff.   I don’t know how she does it. All I can say is that I have truly underestimated writers who do this sort of thing for a living.  I don’t know how the writer’s of Greys or All Saints can do this without ten years of med school…

Hopefully I will get around to a draft this weekend so I can get it done.  But next week is hectic too because I’m supposed to be completing my second draft of one of my features this coming week.  AGH.

WII FIT:

Lost .5 kg and .15% BMI.  GO DIET SHAKES!

______